Saturday, January 31, 2004
Something about this 'living high' thing
There is a special girl in my life. I can’t rightfully say that she was the first special girl in my life; then the real title-holder would come here to Chennai all the way from her B-school in Jamshedpur with the express purpose of castrating me. So I will let sleeping dogs and reclining knives lie as they are, and merely state that this girl I met in Chennai has come to mean a lot to me.
I’m not sure where this is going to take me. We are friends – excellent friends. I talk to her and listen to her and nod at her words. I smile at her words and scoff at them too and also take her seriously. I hate it when I know she’s suffering, and I try to comfort her. As huge as an egoist as I am, you can imagine with what great difficulty it is that I can quell the intense desire to respond to her words and narrate an incident from my life and hence turn the story into a story about me instead of her… but in spite of my monstrous ego (very rightly noted by that bald man whom I fantasize about pushing down the stairs nightly) I actually manage to shut my stupid mouth at times and not turn her woes into a tale of woes. I think that’s what friendship is about – listening, and empathizing. Sharing and talking… Those are some of the things my closest friends have taught me – from Sensei in Calcutta to that castrating girl in Jamshedpur, to Fernandes (who insists by the way that she's referred to hereafter by her very sexy name of Sharon Sensuality) and Nelly, my legal parents in Chennai – and these are some of the things I hope will stand me in good stead once I leave Chennai too.
I think in order to live high, every guy needs a special girl in his life – or guy, depending on your orientation. I think that you need to be with that special girl, and sit with her and listen to her laugh and talk, and wonder where all this is going to lead. You might want to weave dreams in the air, and you might be able to see those very dreams crumble right there in front of you not so very later… but those dreams are important. I think you need to sneak up with her and watch the stars on a clear night and talk silly, inconsequential things like rock concerts… and important things about missing your parents… and neutral things too like the chicken kadai you ate for lunch. You need to share ice cream with that special girl and you need to feel warm. You need to feel high.
Don’t get me wrong – I’m not talking about being in love – I’ll tell you how to cross that bridge once I get there myself. I’m just telling you to take the plunge and let yourself go. Do make sure to carry your parachute with you.
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